08132010

tonight was a night of..well..i wouldnt know how to describe it.

mysterious? eventful? enlightening? yet at the end of the night you still end up guessing.

just like you always do.

how do you sleep at night?

you dont. you write until you find the right answers for yourself. you write until you figure out the answer to that lingering question

at the back of your head, hoping, that right when you lie down on that bed, you have at least a portion of what youre really looking for.

how do you sleep at night?

you dont. you pray and wait on the Great Provider that promises all the answers we will ever need - all the answers that are meant for us.

we dont find that out for ourselves because we never can and we never will until we give up and lay it down. we dont provide and make answers for ourselves because all we will ever get back for doing so are questions. i suggest you dont disappoint yourself if youre thinking of trying.

how do you sleep at night?"

i remember sharing something to a small group of friends about what it means to limit something and how much of yourself you dont help by doing so.

i remember Moses and how he questioned God about what He will achieve in his life. God questioned him 'who gave man his mouth? and who makes him deaf or mute?...gives him sight or makes him blind? Is it not I the Lord?

who gives us our ability to speak and think and act? who made the heavens and the earth? the stars? who controls the rain and the storms and, by word of mouth, create existence?

do not belittle God and what He can and will do for you. do not put him in a box and think that He cannot deliver you out of the situation youre in. the problem with us sometimes is that we dont know enough of God and how much of a God He really is. we dont choose to know him enough for him to reveal himself in the scenarios that we are in and the kind of God he will be in that present experience.

we dont let ourselves open up to him in vulnerability and surrender in such a way how walls were made to keep people out when all were doing is cornering ourselves in. we let our humanity take over thinking we can do it ourselves and thus block God from revealing the full extent of his glory and love and abounding grace.

choose Him. allow Him to do the work.

who's in control?

He will be the kind of God for you and that difficult situation you are in. A Friend in times of l pain; The Healer in times of sickness, The Savior in times of trouble; and The Provider in time of need. and He can be more than this. allow him to be that kind of God for you.

moses saw but a glimpse of the back of the glory of God (and that's with God'shand covering him) passing through while they talked and going down the mountain, he became radiant because of it.that is the kind of God you and i have. the kind of God we should allow to work in our lives.

how do i sleep at night?

i reflected on this a bit more on my back home becaus this applies to us as people as well.

we will never go beyond a certain point we set for ourselves until we let our feet take a step beyond it.

dont open up to a friend and you will find none.

dont make your heart available for love and it will get none.

dont share your pain to another and comfort you will find none.

of course, this is only the human element i am talking about.

dont take chances, dont ask, dont make a move and dont expect anything to happen.

Discover the answers for yourself.

if you only knew how much is waiting for you, you'd regret not welcoming it earlier.

if youre not ready then ask yourself why and see if youre right or not.

how do you sleep at night?